The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize