Grow some girl-balls and come out already
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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