I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
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