Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Randomize
