Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that http://tfl.nu/fcpw
  Replies (6) Good night (722) Bad night (2255)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized? http://tfl.nu/64yi
  Replies (9) Good night (2634) Bad night (665)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane.. http://tfl.nu/no57
  Replies (14) Good night (587) Bad night (2320)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (828): Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times. http://tfl.nu/we9q
  Replies (12) Good night (2943) Bad night (698)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection. http://tfl.nu/608m
  Replies (7) Good night (872) Bad night (2897)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything http://tfl.nu/u65o
  Replies (11) Good night (1405) Bad night (734)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony. http://tfl.nu/x4rf
  Replies (3) Good night (1066) Bad night (564)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable". http://tfl.nu/w1e1
  Replies (20) Good night (1650) Bad night (585)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition. http://tfl.nu/pnv9
  Replies (8) Good night (1162) Bad night (551)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (507): Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale. http://tfl.nu/i85n
  Replies (3) Good night (1020) Bad night (406)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame. http://tfl.nu/nf1o
  Replies (3) Good night (357) Bad night (833)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now. http://tfl.nu/qdkd
  Replies (20) Good night (1193) Bad night (567)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!! http://tfl.nu/4ih5
  Replies (9) Good night (618) Bad night (1665)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer http://tfl.nu/9id9
  Replies (3) Good night (943) Bad night (320)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO http://tfl.nu/1per
  Replies (1) Good night (655) Bad night (392)

Randomize