she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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