It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize