grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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