Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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