just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
