Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
