all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
