The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
