did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Randomize
