he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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