are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize