New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Randomize
