Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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