Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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