doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
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