Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
