Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Randomize
