Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
