I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
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Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
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The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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