RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
you didnt know i had herpes?
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
