So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
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