TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
