i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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