Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  The bars here don't close until 4!

  (703): View more from Virginia

  my legs don't close until 4

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): The bars here don't close until 4! (703): my legs don't close until 4 http://tfl.nu/ja9y
  Replies (28) Good night (3679) Bad night (523)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from England

  Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call. http://tfl.nu/fjfe
  Replies (35) Good night (4391) Bad night (521)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park http://tfl.nu/hm3c
  Replies (23) Good night (1197) Bad night (5283)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics" http://tfl.nu/bnvl
  Replies (6) Good night (1052) Bad night (3822)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead, http://tfl.nu/tjky
  Replies (11) Good night (4443) Bad night (1090)
• Favorite

  (863): View more from Florida

  I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (863): I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good http://tfl.nu/hwo6
  Replies (14) Good night (4958) Bad night (1157)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper. http://tfl.nu/m3p5
  Replies (9) Good night (2229) Bad night (993)
• Favorite

  (01): View more from

  He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (01): He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates. http://tfl.nu/mdzx
  Replies (6) Good night (2781) Bad night (809)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room. http://tfl.nu/hh2a
  Replies (6) Good night (2657) Bad night (869)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick? http://tfl.nu/d7bm
  Replies (6) Good night (2656) Bad night (848)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big http://tfl.nu/le84
  Replies (12) Good night (1906) Bad night (2779)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN! http://tfl.nu/o93p
  Replies (4) Good night (902) Bad night (1587)
• Favorite

  (28): View more from

  so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (28): so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours. http://tfl.nu/gbso
  Replies (15) Good night (447) Bad night (1257)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success. http://tfl.nu/py46
  Replies (3) Good night (733) Bad night (315)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1 http://tfl.nu/uvim
  Replies (5) Good night (503) Bad night (204)

Randomize