I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
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