i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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