This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
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