i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
