scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
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