He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
