i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
