dude i'm inner monologue high
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Randomize