his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
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My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
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I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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