i would punch a child for taco bell
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
