I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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