just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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