I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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