and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
