While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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