evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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