Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
