whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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