5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
