she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
