He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
