If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize