tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
