You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
