whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
